Current:Home > Scams'Vanderpump Rules' star Raquel Leviss says she has a 'love addiction.' Is it a real thing? -ThriveEdge Finance
'Vanderpump Rules' star Raquel Leviss says she has a 'love addiction.' Is it a real thing?
View
Date:2025-04-15 05:59:27
Is it possible to become addicted to love? "Vanderpump Rules" star Raquel Leviss − and mental health experts − say it is.
Leviss, who now goes by Rachel and gained notoriety this year for having an affair with her co-star and former friend Ariana Madix's then-boyfriend Tom Sandoval, revealed on the "Just B with Bethenny Frankel" podcast Wednesday she recently learned she suffers from love addiction.
Though love addiction doesn't appear in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, which psychologists use to diagnose mental health conditions, experts agree it's a legitimate phenomenon and one that can lead to disastrous consequences.
"You can blow up your life or other people's," says Stacy Thiry, a mental health clinician with Grow Therapy, adding that these people can be driven to affairs, cyber-stalking and other destructive behavior. "It can be dangerous. Oftentimes it can lead to abusive cycles in relationships as well, so it really is something to be aware of."
What causes love addiction?
At its core, love addiction is a form of anxiety characterized by fears of unworthiness and abandonment.
Stephanie Sarkis, a psychotherapist and author of the book "Healing from Toxic Relationships," says people with anxious attachment styles or those who experienced neglect, abuse or abandonment in childhood are more likely to become addicted.
As a result of experiencing absent or fleeting love early in life, these people, she says, crave approval, affection and intimacy as adults, similar to how some may crave drugs or alcohol.
"You feel like you don't have value outside of a relationship, and you put a lot of meaning onto your relationship to the point where you feel like you can't function without it," Sarkis says.
Love addiction can get exacerbated if someone is in a relationship in which affection arrives intermittently and unpredictably, she adds. This causes the person to wonder when their next "hit" of love is coming and, by extension, their brains to crave it even more.
"It becomes like an addiction where you get a hit basically from this person contacting you, and then, if they don't contact you, you can go through anxiety and rumination, obsession about the relationship," she says. "If a person is inconsistent with their attention, our brains tend to get hooked on that, because it's like a drug hit and withdrawal."
Adam Jablin, a certified life coach and author of the book "Lotsaholic: From a Sick to Sober Superman," says he's worked with many clients who had a love addiction that compounded other habits.
Jablin notes a more accurate name for love addiction might be approval addiction, since the rush sought is quite different from the feelings of security found in a healthy relationship.
"A lot of people with love addiction, they're craving approval," he says. "What they're not realizing is that love and approval are two totally separate things."
'Vanderpump Rules' drama:Tom Sandoval, Raquel Leviss, Ariana Madix and forgiveness
Mega Millions reached over $1.5B.When does playing the lottery become a problem?
Struggling with love addiction? Try these tips
If you think you might have a love addiction, therapists offer the following tips:
- Seek therapy: Mental health experts agree love addiction is best treated with the help of a professional.
- Join a support group: Thiry recommends joining groups like Love Addicts Anonymous online, and Sarkis adds 12-step programs like Co-Dependents Anonymous and Adult Children of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families can also help people cope with love addiction. "Having a group environment can be really helpful, because that can be an opportunity to have healthy relationships with healthy boundaries modeled for you to experience what healthy does look and feel like," Thiry says.
- Figure out your attachment style: Finding out if you have an anxious attachment style through counseling or research can also help shed light on what you're feeling.
- Feel your feelings: "Part of the healing process is getting in touch with feeling your feelings and confronting them and experiencing them," Sarkis says. "It can be daunting for someone that has survived by shoving their feelings down. It can take some work, and progress comes in stages. You want to be really gentle with yourself."
'Vanderpump Rules' reunion highlights:Tom Sandoval, Ariana Madix get into heated fight
Many people cheat in the summer.How to prevent it and improve your relationship.
veryGood! (973)
Related
- Have Dry, Sensitive Skin? You Need To Add These Gentle Skincare Products to Your Routine
- Amid Continuing Drought, Arizona Is Coming up With New Sources of Water—if Cities Can Afford Them
- Logan Paul's Company Prime Defends Its Energy Drink Amid Backlash
- Global Warming Could Drive Pulses of Ice Sheet Retreat Reaching 2,000 Feet Per Day
- 2 killed, 3 injured in shooting at makeshift club in Houston
- From Gas Wells to Rubber Ducks to Incineration, the Plastics Lifecycle Causes ‘Horrific Harm’ to the Planet and People, Report Shows
- Cocaine sharks may be exposed to drugs in the Florida Keys, researchers say
- A University of Maryland Health Researcher Probes the Climate Threat to Those With Chronic Diseases
- San Francisco names street for Associated Press photographer who captured the iconic Iwo Jima photo
- Mama June Shannon Gives Update on Anna “Chickadee” Cardwell’s Cancer Battle
Ranking
- Which apps offer encrypted messaging? How to switch and what to know after feds’ warning
- To Reduce Mortality From High Heat in Cities, a New Study Recommends Trees
- Make Sure You Never Lose Your Favorite Photos and Save 58% On the Picture Keeper Connect
- Will Smith, Glenn Close and other celebs support for Jamie Foxx after he speaks out on medical condition
- US wholesale inflation accelerated in November in sign that some price pressures remain elevated
- Extreme Makeover: Home Edition’s Ty Pennington Hospitalized 2 Days After Barbie Red Carpet
- Trader Joe's cookies recalled because they may contain rocks
- Earth Could Warm 3 Degrees if Nations Keep Building Coal Plants, New Research Warns
Recommendation
Paula Abdul settles lawsuit with former 'So You Think You Can Dance' co
Summer of '69: When Charles Manson Scared the Hell Out of Hollywood
A US Non-Profit Aims to Reduce Emissions of a Super Climate Pollutant From Chemical Plants in China
Vanderpump Rules’ Lala Kent Claps Back at “Mom Shaming” Over Her “Hot” Photo
At site of suspected mass killings, Syrians recall horrors, hope for answers
California Enters ‘Uncharted Territory’ After Cutting Payments to Rooftop Solar Owners by 75 Percent
Some will starve, many may die, U.N. warns after Russia pulls out of grain deal
Shell Refinery Unit Had History of Malfunctions Before Fire